By Mariya Rizwan
One of my friends was struggling to conceive a baby. After three years of marriage, she became a mother of an adorable baby boy. From the day she knew she was pregnant, she was too cautious. She did everything in her scope to save that pregnancy so that it goes smoothly and she could have a healthy pregnancy. During her pregnancy days, the doctor diagnosed her with a low-lying placenta. Therefore, they advised her to rest because she was told that if she exerted much, she could have heavy bleeding. However, those days passed gracefully, and she became a mother soon.
After her son was born, she was too possessive and extra caring for him. It was hard for her to let him walk because she dreaded he might fall. She became used to going the extra mile to save her kid from any harm. Moreover, she would overthink a ride on the swing or even play with other kids could harm him physically. Deep inside, she was petrified of losing her child so much that she became an obstacle to his growth. Then she was told to let him grow. She had to go out of her comfort zone for that and struggled with herself to let him grow.
The nature of parents varies from each other. No two parents are the same. Therefore, all have different coping mechanisms. Some do not even give a damn about whatever their kid does the whole day. But some are so damn overprotective that they even bathe their toddlers with boiled water.
As parents, it is essential to maintain a balance between being too careless and too careful. At every step of life, always think about two things:
If I behave like this, what consequences will it bring to my child?
If I behave like this, how will it affect my child’s growth?
For parents, not the same things work for all. There is no such formula that works perfectly, and that tells that this is fine and that is not. To let your child walk on their own, you have to leave their hand. Initially, it must be terrifying that they might fall, but for their growth, and betterment, you have to go out of your comfort zone.
In various stages of life, you would never want to get separated from your child even if they are grown up. But for their betterment, you will have to do this. In all cases, you must think about how a certain move will affect their lives and make them stand out shortly.
I have seen some mothers sobbing on the first day of their child’s school. When asked, they tell you they have never got separated ever from their child. That makes sense. They need to be counseled and dealt with empathy. But that does not mean that the kid would not go to school.
As parents, you have to kill your comfort zone for the sake of your child’s growth. That might not be easy for you at all. But you need to train yourself for it. Always think why are you behaving like this? And if you do not let your child grow right now, what consequences will they have to bear in the future because of this decision you took today?